Key Takeaways:

1. Personalized Approach: A good online psychologist tailors their methods to the needs of each client.
2. Trust and Respect: They create a safe environment and respect their clients' autonomy.
3. Effective Communication: A good psychologist listens, understands, and communicates effectively with their clients.

The decision to choose an online psychologist who is the right fit for you is of great importance for your mental health and personal development. In this article, we will highlight ten signs that indicate your psychologist is the right one for you. From active listening to building trust and the variety of solutions offered – these characteristics should help you make an informed decision when choosing your online psychologist.

Table of contents here

1. They truly listen to you

Listening must be the easiest part of a psychologist's job, right? Not quite. Listening is a complex skill that involves much more than just passively waiting while someone else speaks. A good psychologist signals that they are not just taking in your words, but also understanding them.

When you speak with your psychologist via video, you should feel that they are giving you their full attention. It's important that they are not only physically present but also mentally and emotionally with you.

If you feel your psychologist is distracted – perhaps they seem to constantly check the clock as if waiting for the session to end – then that's a clear sign they are not fully focused on you and your needs.

Then it might be time to consider a change.

What active listening might look like: There should be nonverbal cues of listening, such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body posture. Additionally, your psychologist might summarize or reflect on what you've said, or ask for clarification.

2. You feel validated

Your online psychologist should validate your thoughts, emotions, actions, and experiences. This doesn't mean they agree with everything you say or do.

In fact, there's an important distinction between validation and agreement.

When we validate something, it's about recognition and acceptance. An online psychologist who validates you acknowledges what you share with them. They see what is said as the truth of your experience.

Agreement, in contrast, represents a value judgment. A competent psychologist strives to avoid such value judgments about your thoughts, statements, or actions.

It's not their role to evaluate or judge your experiences, but rather to understand and validate them. They are there to help you draw your own conclusions and find your own path, not to impose their own values or opinions.

A good psychologist recognizes that you are the expert on your own life, and their role is to support you in finding your own insights and solutions.

3. They want what's best for you

A good online psychologist is there to offer resources and recommendations while respecting your autonomy. You should never feel that they are forcing you into something you don't want to do.

This also includes decisions you make regarding your own treatment, such as seeking another professional or pausing online therapy for a few weeks.

A professional psychologist will accept your decision, even if it doesn't personally benefit them.

To explain this even more simply: A good psychologist is like a helpful companion on your journey to recovery. They provide you with advice and tools, but always respect your decisions and wishes. You should never feel that they are pushing you into something you don't want.

And if you decide to take a break or try a different approach, a good therapist should support that, even if it means they lose you as a client. Because the most important thing for a good online psychologist is always your well-being and progress.

4. Things are explained simply and clearly

A good online psychologist is like a good physics teacher who can explain complex ideas in simple terms. They should be able to speak in a way that is easy to understand, even if the topic is complex.

And if you don't understand something, they should be patient enough to explain it again. As long as it takes for you to grasp it.

Effective communication refers not only to speaking but also to ensuring that the message is understood.

Although most psychologists and psychological psychotherapists have years of training behind them, their language should be accessible and not overly academic.

5. Regular check-ins

It might feel uncomfortable to address certain topics with your psychologist, such as feeling dissatisfied with the progress of your therapy.

As a trained professional, a psychologist should initiate regular check-ins with you. They should regularly take the time to ask you how you think your therapy is progressing and adapt accordingly.

If you feel something isn't working, they should encourage you to address it and might even help you find another psychologist or even a psychological psychotherapist near you. Someone who is a better fit for you.

Because the most important thing for successful therapy is always your well-being and progress.

6. They earn your trust

A good online psychologist earns your trust by creating a safe and supportive environment where you can feel free. In such an environment, you can share your thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment.

You should be able to assess after one or two sessions whether you trust your therapist.

If you feel that trust is lacking, it might be better to seek another psychologist rather than waiting to see if trust builds over time.

Because in any relationship, trust is absolutely crucial.

Psychologie Heute expresses the importance of trust as follows: By transferring trust to others, we ward off fear – because we must trust. Source

7. They believe you can change

A good psychologist is like a coach who challenges you to change certain behavioral patterns, but always with respect.

They can prompt you to think about and question your thought patterns, but always in a way that doesn't make you feel bad or guilty.

If you feel your therapist doesn't respect you or makes you feel bad, it might be time to seek a change.

In a successful relationship, respect is just as important as trust.

8. They offer a variety of solutions

A good psychologist offers a variety of solutions and approaches to help you. They understand that not every method works for everyone and are willing to try different techniques until they find what works best for you.

They offer you a whole toolbox full of possibilities, instead of relying on just a single tool.

Because therapy is about finding individualized solutions tailored to your specific needs and challenges.

As a trained instructor for progressive muscle relaxation, I am aware that not every method works equally well for every one of my course participants.

Every participant is unique, with individual needs and challenges. Therefore, in my approach as a psychologist, I am always ready to adapt my methods and try new techniques to meet the needs of many people.

9. They don't pressure you into therapy

A good psychologist won't pressure or rush you. They will understand that every person and every situation is unique, and that therapy must be adjusted accordingly.

They will work with you to create realistic goals and a feasible timeline. They should be willing to adjust this plan if your needs or circumstances change.

Because therapy is about helping you. This means that therapy should adapt to you, not the other way around.

10. You can recognize the value of the work.

A good therapist helps you recognize the value and benefits of therapy. Even if therapy can sometimes be challenging, you should feel that it moves you forward and helps you achieve your goals.

A good online psychologist gives you the confidence and hope that you can achieve positive changes in your life through your hard work.

Because ultimately, the goal of therapy is to help you feel better and improve your life.

Updated on: 11. Juli 2025

Magazine Psychological counseling

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